Parlez-vous français?
It seems that this has become a very very occasional blog.
Hello? Are you there? It's been two years since my last blog.
The last time I checked in, I was back in Belize remodeling a bedroom at the beginning of my year off from school. That year came and went so quickly. I spent 2021 living at home and occupying myself with a variety of little projects. I baked an awful lot of yummy cakes and bread, read a few books, painted some murals, adopted a cat, got my driver’s license, then got a dog, caught up with childhood friends, and reconnected with nature.
Mom and Leica <3
Most of my year was spent in solitude as I tried to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. When I graduated high school in 2020, I had every intention to immediately move to London in the fall and study studio art. COVID-19 quickly made a drastic change in those plans, as borders shut down and embassies closed indefinitely. At that point, I was forced to reconsider all my future plans. While in the moment I was frustrated and desperate to start a new chapter, in retrospect, I'm thankful for the time that I got to hit pause and reevaluate my interests. I was incredibly blessed to have the support and financial means to take a gap year and I am still very grateful.
So how did I spend that year?
I had a lot of one-sided conversations with my tabby cat and weekend getaways with my parents hiking to waterfalls or cooler-packed picnics at the beach, but mainly, I actually had the time to figure out that I wanted to go to Paris to study fashion at the end of my year.
So let’s fast forward to now.
I've been living in France for about 5 months. Last September, I got off an airplane with just my carry-on and 1 suitcase for company. I'd never been to Europe, much less France before and I had to make the move alone due to some uncontrollable circumstances. When I got to my Airbnb that afternoon, I immediately passed out on the couch and woke up a few hours later to the unmistakable sound of French ambulances and cigarette smoke. Feeling so nauseous and jetlagged, exhausted from not sleeping on my flight, I thought to myself "What the hell am I doing here?"
Instant panic and regret.
I found myself on the other side of the Atlantic, alone, far from everyone I knew. And at that point, I literally did not know one person on the entire continent of Europe. It's funny how so many things can change in a mere few months. Now I've just finished my first semester of school, found my own little group of kind & supportive friends, and begun settling into a new life here.
Things are often still difficult (French administration is infamous for very valid reasons, anxiety is hard, and being away from everything that is comfortable is challenging) but there are many wonderful little things that overshadow the difficult.
When I have the time outside of school, I love to create a new playlist and go on an aimless walk around the city. You'll often find me in one of those little green chairs at Jardin des Tuileries with a fresh baguette or sitting by the Seine with a journal. Museums are free for students here in the city so I can visit Monet's Water Lilies at the L'Orangerie or Venus de Milo in the Louvre whenever I so choose.
It doesn't take much to feel rich living here.
Although the city and its people get a bad reputation for snooty behavior, I've found many charming things about the everyday routine. I love that they do not care for service at cafes and restaurants, but always make sure to wrap your flowers in paper and ribbon when you stop by the fleuriste. I love that everyone stops to hold the door open for others in the metro even during rush hours. I love it when you can usually find the streets full of people right after rain. I love the smell of buttery pastries when you walk by the boulangerie (and there is a boulangerie on every corner). And somehow, I even find the routine of expressos and cigarettes charming.
The people that I've met here are warm and kind-hearted and it is the most accepted I've felt in years. I'm also finding what I'm studying right now to be exciting and constantly inspiring.
So it seems that Paris will be my home for the next few years. Curious to see what new experiences will come my way and where this path will take me.
I'll talk to you soon.
xx
